Lucile S.Rowntree Eulogy

Eulogy for Annie Lucile Rowntree

Born: January 12th, 1912
Died: March 9th, 2008


Services at First United Methodist Church Grand Prairie, Texas
The Baker Chapel

By: Paul A. Rowntree, Lucky Number Seven


“THE PICTURE”

“A Memory That Can Not Be Taken Away Because of this day.”

Good afternoon, my name is Paul Rowntree, Lucky Number Seven. I have always said that I’m lucky; I have always been lucky, true statement. Today, I want to alter that statement and say what I have always known. I am very blessed to have been born into the wonderful family.

For those in this room that have lived awhile, and have experienced this day, you understand. This day, a day in your life when you lose someone that is so dear and special to you. That day in your life when you lose someone that loved you, nurtured, and counseled you. That day in your life when you lose someone that you identify, they have influenced what you are and what you have become as a human being. That day in your life that you lose someone that has sacrificed for you and you know it. That day in your life that you lose someone that has said a prayer for you along your path. That day, that day in your life that you lose a parent, it penetrates the heart and sole. We are grateful to have a friend with us today.

This day for me has brought about a rush of memories, a flood of memories, hundreds of them, memories of Mother coming at me rapid fire. I want to make the distinction that they are my memories. I say that because I know my brothers and sisters, the grands and the greats, all have their own memories of Momee. That’s what we called her, our Momee, the Momee. I decided to share a couple of my memories with you today, as I think these memories will tell you what our mother meant to us and clearly reflect on who she was as a person. I ask that you look through these memories to the picture that resonates about our Mother. The picture of a strong, intelligent, independent woman/mother, a person of character, and values. Look for the picture that details what she meant to the family, and what she did for this family. Please hear the picture of my mother through my memories.

One of my earliest memories of Mom was as a 6 year old boy, a first grader. The family lived in Lampasas, Texas, central Texas. The family was home that evening and I was curled up in Mother’s lap. I had a permanent reservation for that lap, you see, I was the baby. I had looked up at Mom and said, “Mom, Mom, did you know that next week is open house at my school.” I remember, she smiled and said, “Sweetie, I knew that. I am planning on going to your open house, and I just can’t wait to meet your teacher.” I learned later she had known my teacher for years. I said, “Mom, would you wear your red dress? You know, it’s that red dress that you look so beautiful in. It’s the one you wear to church sometimes.” I remember that she squeezed me tight and leaned down and gave me a kiss; just a peck on the cheek. As she raised up, another peck on the forehead, and as she held me to her, she whispered in my ear. “Sweetie, how’d you know I was planning on wearing that red dress?”

I say to you all, it is a slice of time. As for me, it is the most special moment, the most special memory, a memory of a baby boy that simply adored his beautiful, beautiful mother. It is a memory that can not be taken away because of this day.

How about a memory of high school days? Everyone remembers something about high school days. You remember 16, 17 years old, that time in your life when your confidence exceeds your capacities, you just don’t know it. Well, when I was living here in Grand Prairie on North West 9th Street, I was sixteen, seventeen years old, and I would leave the house. I was leaving the house to go on a date, to be with a friend, just leaving the house. There was Mom! She would stop me at the front door, every time it seemed. I would turn around at the front door, and there she was. She was approaching me, she was addressing me, she was walking up to me, she was standing in front of me. There she was, short in stature. She would stop me for just a second, it did not take but a second. She would do and she would say the same thing every time; it did not vary, not a word. She would put her hands on my face, on my cheeks and she would look me square in the eyes, flash that precious smile, and then she would announce, “Son, you know son, Rowntree boys…. Rowntree boys are gentlemen.” I remember wanting to say,” Mom, I’m sixteen years old, I don’t want to be a gentleman”, but I would not say it to her, not to Mom, not a chance. It is just a sweet memory about a mother that expected good things from her children, a memory that cannot be taken away because of this day. You see the picture?

When I remember Mother, I think of how much fun she was, how funny she was, she just had a way about her. I remember that she made it clear to you when you reached adulthood, she made it clear, it is your deal. Mom put it to me like this. “Son I don’t have any interest in getting into your business, and I am not going to be trying to run your affairs. I can assure you that I will not be giving you advice at every turn, but I want you to always remember, Son, the Methodist Church has always served me well in my life, been there for me. I won’t be getting into your business, won’t be trying to run your affairs and won’t be giving you a lot of advice, but I believe that hot tea in the morning just might extend your life. Son, I won’t be getting into your business, won’t be trying to run your affairs and certainly won’t be offering a lot of advice, but I have learned that the smartest people,” she started laughing, “the smartest people”, she laughed harder, “the smartest people embrace the values of the democratic party” and then she just died laughing. It is just a sweet memory of a mother that had a way about her. The truth is other than those three things, it is your deal, you figure it out, it is time for you to fly. That’s the way she ran it, that is the way she did it. This is a memory that can not be taken away because of this day.

When I remember Mom, I think of the fact that she extended herself to them; more than that, she embraced them, more than that, she loved them. She loved them. The spouses, the spouses of her seven children, she loved them. They knew it, they felt it, they sensed it, and they loved her back. When I think of the Momee I remember how much the Momee loved my Beverly,…. like she was her own. And I know just how much my Beverly loved the Momee. I ask each of you. How lucky am I? A sweet memory that can not be taken away because of this day. You see the picture.

Mother was aware that time was growing short. Recently, maybe two years ago now, Mother and I were in her home, just the two of us. She said to me, “Son, I don’t have many contemporaries left, but if I have a few friends that want to come to my service, I want you to promise me now, that you want keep them too long. I remember that she sighed deeply that day, a long exhale, she shook her head in front of me and said, “I have had a long time to think about this one, Son, and I can’t think of another person that has lived a more charmed, a more blessed life than I have, …not one. And then as if to comfort me, she reached out and patted me on the arm, and said, “ After all son, do you know anyone else that is approaching 95 years old and living in their own home, sitting here talking to their baby of seven? Oh no,Son, you hear me now, when my day comes, I want no long faces, I just want you to get together. I want you to hold each other, I want you to love each other, and I want you to have a party. Son, your mother has lived one wonderful, wonderful, wonderful life.” Ladies and gentlemen, we intend to honor that request today.

Before I leave this podium today, I want to describe my mother to you. This is my description of her, my terms, my words, my phrases, my nouns, my adjectives, my description. I say that because I have not shared this with my brothers and sisters, but I know that they will agree with this description of our Momee.

Lucile Rowntree, in her heart, was one of the most loving, most caring, most sensitive people. She was so, so, gentle, so incredibly sweet, a compassionate soul, always. When you would see my mother, it made no difference when, always on her tongue, she wanted to talk about someone, it was always someone, someone, someone, someone else. It was always about someone else for her, someone in this community, someone else that was down, someone else that was troubled, someone else that was sick, someone else hurting, someone else ill, someone else that just needed a friend, that day. But it was always someone else for her. I tell you true, when I say the word self-centered simply did not apply to her. An incredible quality for sure.

Lucile Rowntree was so smart, so intelligent, unbelievably well read. She could talk to you about anything, anything. You pick the subject. My bet is that she knew a good bit about it. I always said she was just tuned in. She was, indeed, tuned in.

Lucile Rowntree was depression raised, that is the Great Depression raised. She was clearly tuned in politically. She was a life long, flag waving, back-slapping, parade leading, Yellow Dog Democrat. In her heart, in her soul, down to her toes, in her bones, she was clear and definitive about what government should be for the people. That sweet gentle natured sole, oh my, I have seen her become Clarence Darrell a few times. She was just too cool, too fun, she just had a way about her.

Lucile Rowntree loved a hat. She looked precious in a hat. Hot tea in the morning, every morning, cold Dr. Pepper on a hot summer day, regular, green cake, and M&M’s. I should have bought stock in M&M’s,

Lucile Rowntree was our family leader. Proud she was, proud of her roots. If she was here, she would say, ranching roots. Mother was born in Central Texas, north of Austin, Burnet County. Mother was born on the banks of the Rocky, ole Rocky she would call out, a beautiful rock bottom creek meandering through central Texas. Spectacular. Mother was born on the banks of the Rocky Creek. Just down the road is a one horse town called Oakalla, Texas. Do not blink, you will miss Oakalla, Texas. Our favorite nick name for Momee was Oakalle Lu, Oakalle Lucile. She would beam every time, as it would take her back, back to her roots, back to Rocky.

When I think of Mom, I remember the underpinning of love that she had for her siblings. Oh, my! Her big brother, just 5 years older, E. Babe Smith, Edgar Babe Smith, that would be Uncle Buddy to us. Mom always said,” Son ,your Uncle Buddy loved me so much, he took me everywhere with him, he took such care of me when I was young.” It was a life time of devotion and love for a big brother, as it should be.

I will suggest that the best friend of her life was her baby sister, just two years younger than Mom. Dorothy Smith, Dorothy Smith Lewis, Dottie Lewis, that would be Aunt Dottie to us. Mom and Aunt Dottie got such joy from being together. It was a lifetime of loving one another, of supporting one another, of dreaming, of praying, of hoping, of working , of living. It was just a loving family. Impressive.

If I had only four words to describe my mother, just four words to sum up a soul, four words that would encase what she was about at a core level, and if I could open up my Mothers heart and look inside, I believe that deep down in the lining and the fabric of her heart would be stitched these four words……SHE LOVED A CHILD. My mom’s life was about a child, always a child, any child, anywhere, anytime, any child, not just my children and not just the children of this family. My mother’s heart would shutter at the site of a child not loved, not tended, not cared for. Oh how many times have I heard her say? “Son, let’s talk here. What about the children, Son? Just what about the children?” I have always known that this family was the beneficiary of this priority in her life, and grateful for it.

And finally, my father, my daddy, John Thomas Rowntree married Annie Lucile Smith in October of 1930. Thirty-three Years of marriage and seven children, Dad left this world in his late 50’s, I was in high school. Mom had been widowed for forty-four years. He has been gone so long. Dad was a school teacher. I don’t think my father ever drew a breath as an adult that he did not shoulder the pressure, the strain, the stress of trying to make a living for this large family. While he has been gone a lifetime, I have never forgotten the way my father referred to my mother, his wife, his bride, the love of his life, the mother of his children. He did it the same every time when he would say, “Lucile Rowntree, she is my Grand Lady.” I hear that word and I think of her every time, you see, .she was. That she was.

I want to close today with one final memory that I believe completes the picture, the picture of the importance of our mother in our life. The setting occurred about ten or twelve years ago. Mom was suffering osteoporosis and back pain. My sister, Mary Kuhn and I delivered Mom to an orthopedic specialist to get her some relief, some help. My sister, Mary Kuhn went with Mom to the examination room. I stayed in the waiting room. The waiting room of a doctor’s office, you have been there. My eyes found the eyes of the people waiting for service and attention. You know the window. That is when I saw it, that is when I spotted it. Just to the left of the window in that room, there was a sign, a big sign, a huge sign, triple spaced, bold fonted. The sign had a title. I read it carefully, and slowly. It stuck for me. The title read, “Three Things That Will Insure Success and Happiness In Your Life”.

I remember it read, “Marry the Right Spouse”, I remember it said, “Work, Work at Something Worthy Of Your Time and Talent.” Ladies and gentlemen, I do not recount and recall this story, because of those two things, not at all. The reason that I tell this memory today, was that third thing, that third thing written on that wall that day. That third thing that set me back in my chair and brought tears to my face. That third thing that was reported to insure success and happiness in your life, read, “Don’t Ever Do Anything That Would Not Make Your Mother Proud.” I don’t mind saying that I sat there that day, a grown man, with tears rolling down my face. You see, I don’t know how many times, I have no way of knowing how many times, my precious mother looked me square and said to me, “Son, you just make me proud of you. Son, you just make me proud of you.” I have spent a my life trying to live up to that call. That always had value for me. It is crazy that at my age I would say that I still work at it today.

Ladies and Gentlemen, don’t you see, my family sitting here, we have been stamped, stamped, stamped by the Momee. She would look us square and say, “Sweetie, you just make me proud of you, make me proud of you.”

HERE’S TO YOU MOMEE, HERE’S TO YOU. FOR WHAT YOU MEANT TO US AND FOR WHAT YOU DID FOR US.







Let Us Pray:

Heavenly Father, we bow before you today, struggling for just the right words that express just how special our Mother was in our life.

We give you thanks today, as we have a thousand times for the life of our Mother, for her commitment to this family, we give thank you for her toughness, her strength, her perseverance, we thank you for her love, her care, her council, today we give thanks for her sacrifice for us, for all the prayers you have heard in our behalf. Today we just thank you for all of it, all of it.

Secondly, we want to give you a special thanks for her longevity, for her long life. She has been in our life so long, through the majority of her own children’s lives. She has been here to share laugh, to share love, to share the grands, and the greats, the successes of a family. And when things do not go right and wagon’s get circled, she was always so strong,

It is on this day, God, that we give her to you, for your care and comfort. For this family, one and all, we will testify, we know her value, for to us dear God, our Mother, Lucile Rowntree, she has been our Angel, our Angel on this earth.

It is in your name, Lord, and the name of the Christ that we offer this prayer for our Momee.

Amen

Easter at 3 Trees

It was definitely tough not having the matriarch of the last 40+ years of the Rowntree family at 3 Trees Ranch for Easter, but here are some of the pics from the weekend. The weather was perfect, and she was surely missed. I sincerely hope that this blog is a catalyst to maintain the traditions of our family in Momee's absence!!!

http://picasaweb.google.com/mattrowntree
*you'll probably need your google login to access these pics, but they are worth it.


Matt

From Stella Mae - Lucile Rowntree's First Cousin

Thank you so much for including me in the Rowntree Family Contact Info.
My computer skills are so minimal that I can barely send and receive e-mail, but it is good to see the whole family listing by families, and to get a sense of where each one at this date. (I know how fleeting such locations can be.)
Lucile was the grown-up cousin who had my life-long admiration, so I was glad I could be with her family at her memorial service. Stella Mae Scharf

Relating the Story of Lucile Rowntree's Birth upon the occasion of her interment 3/15/2008

Long ago on a cold and gloomy day in January, a lone horseman rode fast toward the town miles away. Bundled up against the wind and light snow, the hired man hunched over the horse’s back as he urged his horse on. The wife of his employer needed a doctor to assist in the birth of her second child who was trying to come into the world a bit early.
Riding in a small covered buggy toward a home a few miles away, the anxious husband hurried to ask his mother-in-law to come and assist with the birth until the doctor could be fetched. He had left his brave and laboring wife with a young hired girl to assist her, but he knew he needed someone more experienced than the frightened fifteen-year-old Maud.
In the small ranch house built of wood and stone, Leila, the expectant mother, tried to await the help of doctor and her mother, but nature urged differently. Annie Lucile Smith came into the world attended only by her mother, for young Maud had run away in fear when the moment of delivery arrived. Leila, alone, swaddled her baby in the bed sheets, hobbled to the kitchen, cut the umbilical cord, boiled water for bathing her baby, and was found standing at the kitchen sink completing her tasks when her husband and mother finally arrived to help her. Several hours later, the doctor arrived and pronounced mother and child healthy and strong.
The home into which Annie Lucile was born had no electricity, running water or indoor plumbing, but she had parents of strength and resilience. She had an older brother to admire and soon a younger sister to adore. Lucile was bright, beautiful and beloved.
Those of us here knew of her strength, goodness and loving nature. Our lives are so rich for having known her love. We bring her back here to rest 96 years later.
“ Her children rise up and call her blessed.” Proverbs 31:28

Saying Goodbye

After returning home from an emotional weekend, filled with numerous farewells to Lucile, the entire last week has neatly distilled in my mind to a few prominent thoughts, two of which I wanted to share.

The first thought is that the Rowntree clan has been blessed with a new opportunity as a family. As an outlaw, I often watch the goings-on and see a collection of individuals, drawn together for events organized by others. This last weekend I saw more sharing of time, stories, emotions and laughter than ever before.

The gathering seemed charged with a desire to reach out, and while it's heart-breaking to see Lucile's death being necessary to galvanize the group as a whole, it has served a very positive purpose. I think the challenge (opportunity) will be to maintain all the energy and contact from here on. The annual reunion surrounding her birthday will now have to take place based on all the family member's desire to preserve a great clan.

The second thought, is that in the end, we're judged by the number of ripples we leave on the pond.

In my work in motivation and goal-setting coaching, one of the exercises is to write your own eulogy. It makes a person focus on where they've been and where they intend to go. Most people come away feeling as if they haven't lived up to their potential, and vowing to improve.

I don't think anyone can ever truly know how they have affected others' lives, but they can work to do their best to leave the Earth a better place than when they arrived. Lucile clearly did this. She was a selfless servant (as so many pointed out) who gave completely of herself. Those who met her came away better, and those who truly knew her found a friend, a mentor, a safe haven and a delightful companion.

Her life charged, and changed many others. The ripples will continue for many generations to come, and not diminish if we all work to further her impact in our own daily interactions with friends, family, business contacts and complete strangers. A big challenge -- but not too lofty a goal -- and a great way to honor her memory.

My personal thanks to each of you for the conversations, tears, laughter and warm embraces this last weekend. I felt her looking down and enjoying the activity.

Ski Sullivan

Rowntree Contact Information 2008

Dallas News Listing

All,
You can view the formal obituary at the Dallas News site link in the title of this post.

Upcoming Posts and Tributes

To All,
We're starting this site as a tribute to our dear Lucile.
Please feel free to comment on any and all posts. As I get the email roster from Rachel, and additional photos from you all, we will add them into the library to be viewed here as a slideshow.

Tributes from the Dallas Morning News

Many people are leaving tributes to Lucile on the Dallas Morning News website. We have linked to it above, and include comments we read today, Friday March 14, 2008.

March 13, 2008
I'LL MISS my great-grandmother
Meredith Sullivan (GP, TX)

March 13, 2008
The sweetest grandmother a girl could ask for. So full of love, kindness, good advice and a soft kiss. Her goodness radiated. You were a better person for having known her. I will miss her so much! - Laura
Laura Moore Van Hoosier (TX)

March 12, 2008
After hearing so many great things about your grandmother (Laura Van Hoosier) since I met you in the past year, I know she will be missed by many. Your family is in our thoughts and prayers.
Larie Cappadonna (Magnolia, TX)

March 12, 2008
I remember Lucile from Lee Jr. High in Grand Prairie. I was choir teacher from 1955 to 1969. She was a lovely person. I extend my condolences to the family.
James Anthony (Quitman, TX)

March 12, 2008
In 1967 your mom taught me English Composition. She was one of the most remarkably gifted teachers of all my 16 years of school. I shall never forget her.
Robert Trietsch (Grand Prairie, TX)


March 12, 2008
Paul,
I am sorry to hear about your Mother's passing. What an incredible life & legacy.
Regards,
Gayla
Gayla Perkins (Dallas, TX)